Childhood trauma made me a prime target for Satan and drove me to seek healing by blending new age practices with Christianity.
BY JAMIE ADMIRE
Spirit Sanctified
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Satan Uses Trauma to Try to Capture Your Soul
My story of leaving the occult and coming into the loving arms of Jesus and the Kingdom of Heaven shares common threads with the stories of others who knowingly (or unknowingly, like myself) fell into worshiping Satan.
Childhood trauma, abandonment, unworthiness, and distrust, coupled with lacking a religious lens through which to discern all of this HOT, unhealed garbage makes you a prime target and breeding ground for Satan and his minions to infiltrate your mind, body, and soul.
This is exactly what they did, unbeknownst to me. That is, until seven months ago when God chose to rip the scales off my eyes and revealed to me in one fell swoop the depths of my sin.
Praise be to GOD!!!
Childhood Trauma Led Me to Seek Healing in The Occult
My story begins with my mother. She endured a lot of abuse growing up, the worst of it being the day she came home to find the house she shared with her mother, stepfather, and HER young daughter empty. They stole my half-sister, abandoned my mother, and left the state.
My parents were dating at the time and went on to get married. They fought through the legal system, but in the early 80s forgery was easy, and her mother and stepfather got away with it. Eventually, the wheels fell off, and by the time I was five years old my mother and father split.
As my life progressed, I battled feelings of unworthiness. My birth was the result of failed contraception. I also placed the blame for my mother's final mental health breakdown on myself. I was their last child and perceived myself to be the straw that broke her back, leading to her depression, drug abuse, and eventually my parents' divorce. This unchecked belief resulted in a lifelong fear of abandonment and suppressed rage.
Misplacing Blame Upon God
I then began to distrust God. I wasn't raised in a religious family, and I never saw my family turn to God during hardship. I experienced people in my life falling short and disappointing me as a child, which chipped away at my trust in my environment, people, and the world.
I became hyper-vigilant of my surroundings and was never at peace. In an attempt to prevent things from falling apart (which from my viewpoint seemed to be a likely outcome), I was also hyper-aware of what I could fix or improve.
This all led me to seek healing by inadequate, worldly means away from God through occult practices, addictions, and substance abuse. I turned to things that did not serve to heal or sustain my soul.
Yoga: An Occult Doorway
As a young adult in college, I began dabbling in "spiritual" endeavors. At the time, I went to a yoga class, where after one month I sensed a difference. Little did I know, what I sensed was demonic.
This is a common tactic of Satan, who lies fervently to peak our curiosity. When we choose to entertain said lie, it opens a doorway through which Satan holds rights to put on a display. This is what I experienced and then leaned into. This led to an occult anchor, or pact, with demons, to whom I had given away my rights.
By being a willing participant in this whole process, the battle for your soul gets more complicated at this point. This wasn't my first occult anchor, but it instigated a greater pact with Satan that took me years to decipher.
Blending New Age Practices With Faux Christianity
After this month, I believed I was connecting to God and went to get baptized at a local church where I received little to no theological education beforehand. Looking back, I wonder if this was God's hand of provision fighting for my soul and a missed opportunity for me to see the mortal sin I was committing.
I began reading the Bible regularly, yet was planning to join a yoga teacher training shortly after. Once the course began, I told my then-boyfriend that what I was learning in this class didn't seem to add up with what the Bible said. As a Christian who was raised in the church, I viewed him as an authority. He told me that since I already paid for the training, I might as well finish and that by the end I would know what to do.
Unfortunately, I wanted to keep learning and was naive enough to think I could decipher the truth. At the end of the training, I had to do a book report and chose Ask and It is Given by Esther Hicks. It teaches about the Law of Attraction and is channeled by an entity called Abraham. I hadn’t considered these concepts beforehand, it was all new.
Once again, this lie led to even more pacts with Satan. With my training complete, I put down my Bible and didn't look back for a decade.
My continuation of blending new age practices with faux Christianity got worse. I completely disregarded and failed to understand the greatest commandment: "You should love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength." (Deuteronomy 6:5)
My continuation of blending new age practices with faux Christianity got worse. I completely disregarded and failed to understand the greatest commandment: "You should love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength." (Deuteronomy 6:5)
I began ingesting YouTube content to "study" what I thought was "real spirituality." Synchronicity, reincarnation, conspiracy media, altered states of consciousness – the whole gambit.
Crisis Led Me Deeper into Occult Bondage
I had a total psychological breakdown. Looking back, I see I was on the verge of schizophrenia. I angrily told my family the "truth of this world," then proceeded to sell all of my belongings and move to Hawaii to live with people in an ashram who "got it." They were followers of the Indian Guru Paramhansa Yogananda.
After a few failed months, I left the ashram. My life was in shambles, go figure. Still in Hawaii, I received a phone call: my grandmother was diagnosed with cancer. I gratefully found my escape and headed home.
It wasn't until after I bought my plane ticket that I found out I was pregnant. I instantly knew I would get an abortion and thus became insanely sick. Barely making it off the first flight, I was hospitalized and told I had an untreatable condition called hyperemesis gravidarum. My father flew out to El Paso to bring me home.
Unfortunately, I went through with the abortion and a few months later, my stepmother committed suicide. I fell deeper into depression and relied on my understanding of these “self-healing” practices to save me. It was an endless loop that never worked and ultimately led to my breaking point (again) many, many years later.
I Could Finally See The Truth
Before I was led into this revelation, all of my worldly dreams were "coming true." I was married with two children, had a loving husband, and was on the precipice of opening and owning my yoga studio. I ran a successful massage practice for the previous three years but was burnt out.
I carried the weight of "my calling" to educate the masses on physical and spiritual well-being. On top of this, I attended an Anglican Church every Sunday and thought I was a good Christian!
Yet internally my life was falling apart. It was like all of this unhealed trauma caught up to me at once. I was battling addictions to alcohol and marijuana, and my health took a massive turn for the worst. I could barely eat food without getting sick.
All I could see were problems – my own and those of the people around me. Having all of this "knowledge," I felt it was my duty to lead them to higher understanding. I was guided by ego, pride, and terrible theology. This all brought me to my final breaking point.
I remember being outside in my backyard, FINALLY praying fully to God asking what in the heck was happening – why didn’t I have HIS peace? It was soon after that I remembered Teresa Yanaros. I followed her content over the years, and I knew she had come to Christ. I wondered if she had anything to say about what I was experiencing.
While surfing her YouTube channel, I found a recent video she posted with a Catholic exorcist named Monsignor Steven J. Rossetti.
It was at that moment I realized everything that was wrong with me. I had been fraternizing with the enemy.
My Identity in Christ is Being Restored
It's been a long road to where I am today, but after many, many, MANY tears, education, working with deliverance ministry, renunciation – all the things – and deep-diving into Teresa's newly founded Clarity Accelerator Academy, I finally feel my life being resuscitated.
Everything I previously thought was my identity is now being faithfully and gracefully restored by God through Christ. Instead of me being the hero and on the throne, now I recognize that I'm not the one doing the heavy lifting. It is Christ who heals and redeems. My life has new meaning and purpose.
Everything I previously thought was my identity is now being faithfully and gracefully restored by God through Christ. Instead of me being the hero and on the throne, now I recognize that I'm not the one doing the heavy lifting. It is Christ who heals and redeems. My life has new meaning and purpose.
Thank you, Heavenly Father, for plucking me from the depths of hell and giving me new eyes to see. Now I plead the shed blood of Jesus Christ as my protection from the wickedness and snares of the enemy. Blessed is the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit.
You are Not Alone, and You Never Were
My hope in telling you about my journey is that you possibly relate, and maybe it will help you accept the saving grace and love of the one true triune God. Because it is He, who came all the way down from Heaven, was born to the Blessed Virgin Mary, and is named Jesus Christ that saved me.
He willingly took on all of the suffering and sin of the world upon His body, was crucified, died, buried, and was resurrected, insuring victory for all who have faith in HIM. He did all of this for YOU and me.
Knowing you're reading this means that you live in a fallen world. Chances are you have had worldly trauma, maybe some occult anchors (or not), or are simply sinful because of our human nature. You're not alone, and you never were. We all carry baggage from the past, but it is our right and responsibility to bring it to the foot of the Cross and let Jesus deal with it as He will.
In releasing our burdens, we ask for the One who can truly redeem our past, come into our hearts, and heal what has been broken. If you’re leaving the occult, like myself, this is a step-by-step process. It's not as simple as professing faith in Christ – yes, that is the start, but you need adept experts and hand-holding to guide you.
Pacts were made with Satan, and you NEED help to break the strongholds in your mind that lead you to seek occult comfort, knowledge, and power in the first place. You MUST dismantle those bricks – all the junk – to fully come into the Kingdom of God.
The Clarity Accelerator Academy is a game-changer that helped me immensely during this process. Whether you know it or not, we're created to be in relationship with God, to worship Him and so that He can work in us – through us – as we shine His love back out into the world as beacons of light to other lost souls. God delivered me from the dominion of darkness and He can deliver you too.
About the Author
Jamie Admire, an entrepreneur with a passion for Jesus, has dedicated her life to helping others create better mobility within their bodies, exposing occult lies, and driving home the truth of Christ. Earlier in her career, Jamie was a massage therapist who for a decade helped clients release their musculoskeletal imbalances. With a successful business under her belt and on the brink of launching a yoga studio, Jamie found herself struggling to reconcile her love of Jesus with new-age practices. She then experienced a radical deliverance from the occult. Jamie now teaches others how Satan deceives through the new age and confidently shares her testimony to help build up the Kingdom of God. After going #newagetoJesus she attended Teresa Yanaros's Clarity Accelerator Academy and continues to research, investigate, and share information about the new age deception, occult deliverance, spiritual warfare, and Christian theology.
INTERESTED IN THE ACADEMY? If you are a Christian who left the new age, apply to join the CLARITY ACCELERATOR ACADEMY. The Academy takes the entire process from start to finish of getting oriented after leaving the new age, grounding into theology and spiritual warfare, deprogramming new age lies, renouncing Satan's influence, remaining delivered, and establishing a firm context for Christian living and spiritual formation, bible study, how to pray, how to share the gospel, how to build your testimony, how to share your testimony, and put it ALL into this academy. IT WORKS. People's lives are being transformed by this framework, by the power of the Holy Spirit. Thank you, Jesus, for deliverance!
Jamie is a staff writer for "Real Stories" with Spirit Sanctified.
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